Game 1: Latitude

We arrived late and bedraggled to the arena of sporting greatness that is pitch 15 of regents park softball field. Latitude were even more late, looking equally confused. Game on.

The game got underway and it was clear that neither side had any idea of the rules, with Coach/Umpire/Match Fixer Alan barking out cryptic Softball do’s and don’ts, ordering us about and generally adding to the air of confusion around the game. It was clear that the other team was pretty intimidated by the talent on show among the Ballbusters, and one guy even left to go to toilet and ran home, never to be seen again.

Most of our points came from letting the useless bowlers from the opposing team throw foul balls, and then prancing to first base triumphantly. It was pretty even going for the first couple of innings, with both teams equally useless and playing with a dogged determination to get to the pub and escape the rain.

Notable incidents include Golden Boy John’s sweet shot into the stratosphere which broke some poor girl’s hand, me roughing up an opposing player, Anita falling over, and Ed clattering a poor defenceless girl on third base which was applauded by Coach Alan as being ‘the right thing to do’.

In the final Innings we were 8-4 down, needing 5 to win. We started off well, loading the bases and profiting from Latitude’s erratic bowling. However, Alan, who it must be said, had it in for Metrica from the off, started to show his true colours. Displaying a rather annoying habit of telling the other team how to get us out, whilst keeping it a secret from us, he ruined Lucy’s joyous run to the home plate by informing Latitude that she could be run out by tagging her with the ball. Whatever that means.

We were told, whilst congratulating each other for some great play, that we were all out and we had lost the game, 8-5. It’s a shame because we were definitely the better team, I mean, we had matching T-Shirts; that has to count for something surely. And they were using our mitts! we should have forced them to use bare hands. Next time we need to be more ruthless.

In summary I would say we wuz robbed by a conspiracy between dastardly Latitude and Alan, who showed in the pub afterwards that he will, if asked (and we didn’t) talk about softball literally for the whole evening.

Great effort Ballbusters, thanks to everyone for turning up and enduring lengthy spells of inactivity in a rainy field, we really showed them what we were made of. If its that much fun in the rain, just think how good it will be when/if its actually sunny.